So yeah... Berry's Arts and Crafts Festival was a bust. I made enough to cover the cost of the $15 table, but I'm pretty sure I didn't make enough to cover the cost of the gas I used to get all the way up to Rome. I only sold two things. Did you know that in the year I've been doing this, I've only made $1,200? And the cost of my expenses is waaay more than that. I'm down several hundred dollars. Yay me. As if my financial failure wasn't enough, I also completely destroyed my body at the festival, pulling muscles in my arms, getting a smiley face sunburn on the one part of my back that I couldn't reach with sunscreen, and dropping a table on my ankle to make what is now a very large, oddly shaped bruise. Gaaaah...
Anyway... I have a very short break until my next event which is TimeGate in Atlanta on May 27-29. For those of you who have no idea what TimeGate is, it's a Doctor Who/Stargate convention that my friend Heather pointed out to me. I'm actually kind of excited about this one, but I'm nervous too because if I fail here, I don't know where else I stand a chance. See, I'm kind of hoping that maybe I'll find my niche selling jewelry to my fellow geeks at conventions. Geeks spend a lot of money, especially on costumes for cons. So I'm crossing my fingers and hoping that I can make this work. In preparation, I've been researching jewelry and other items used on both shows to see if I can make reproductions or pieces inspired by various characters, places, and things. Now, I know absolutely nothing about Doctor Who, so I'm pretty much relying on Heather, my favorite Doctor Who fanatic, to point me in the right direction. I am, however, a fan of Stargate SG-1 and Stargate Atlantis, so that part is kind of fun. Except for the part where I can't afford a Stargate costume because I have very little money coming in. That part sucks. Anywhooo, I've got several possible pieces running through my brain, including Replicator block pendants, Adipose charms, Eldrad's ring, Harmony's pendant, and necklaces worn by Teyla Emmagan, Ronon Dex, Osiris, Bynarr, and Amaunet, just to name a few. Knowing me and my lack of motivation, I'll be lucky if I make even half the stuff I have planned out, but still, if anyone has suggestions, let me know. I might just do a collection inspired by the most famous Goa'uld from SG-1... like Ba'al, Amaterasu, Kali, Apophis, Morrigan, Camulus, Cronus, Hathor, Nirrti, etc.
Opinions?
Sunday, April 17, 2011
Sunday, April 3, 2011
Creative Musings...
I don't know how it is for most artistic people, but for me, the creative life is an extremely difficult one. When I was younger, things would flow so freely that there were times I was struggling to get all of my ideas out before they could overwhelm me. Most days were an unbarred flood of creativity straight from my brain and heart into my hands. Then at some point about five years ago, I somehow managed to construct a dam, and now I can't seem to get any of my ideas out. It's incredibly frustrating because I have all of this stuff inside me building up and 90% of it never gets out. The 10% that does make it, I have to force out, and it's usually an exhausting process. There's this huge wall between what I think and what I do, and I don't really know how to tear it down. The biggest problem right now is that I've spent my whole life building up to a career in the arts, and now I can't create. I can't draw, I can't write, I can barely even make jewelry anymore.
Most people don't even know that I want to write a novel. Did you know that? I have this whole story in my head... and only in my head. I've been working on it since I was about 15 years old. I have these wonderful characters, amazingly beautiful cultures, an entire world that I created all on my own... Back when I started it, I wrote about twelve chapters. Of course, since then I've grown up and completely revamped the plot and the characters, so those twelve chapters are worthless. But at the time, I would pass my story around to my classmates, and I had at least ten people waiting on the edge of their seats for me to finish the next chapter. It made me proud of myself and eager to create more. In fact, all of my art has always made me feel that way... until recently. I want that back.
Art in any form is a huge self-esteem boost for me, as well as a release of all of this creative energy I have inside of me. That's what I desperately need, and I'm not sure what's holding me back from getting it. I need to feel good about myself and what I do, and I need to share my ideas with the world, as terrifying as that might be sometimes. I wish I could just take a sledgehammer to all of these walls I've built up around myself. No idea how to do that. Anyone know a good shrink? Sometimes I feel like I'm just crazy.
Anyway, maybe I'll make some future posts about my book... if it's something anyone is interested in. I don't know. It might make me feel better to at least talk about it since I'm obviously not writing it. Bleh. Ok, I'm done ranting.
Quick update on things... Berry's festival was cancelled because of rain and has been moved to April 9th. I'll probably still be there... trying to work things out so I can make it. Hampton's Yellow Pollen Festival was a moderate success. Nothing great, but I sold about seven pieces of jewelry, so I guess that's good. Trying desperately to get up the motivation to finish the commissioned portraits I have lined up since people have been waiting a long time for them. Some people have promised to have jewelry parties for me soon, so hopefully that will happen and I can get some money there. I don't know. I think that's it. Off I go to do more of nothing.
Most people don't even know that I want to write a novel. Did you know that? I have this whole story in my head... and only in my head. I've been working on it since I was about 15 years old. I have these wonderful characters, amazingly beautiful cultures, an entire world that I created all on my own... Back when I started it, I wrote about twelve chapters. Of course, since then I've grown up and completely revamped the plot and the characters, so those twelve chapters are worthless. But at the time, I would pass my story around to my classmates, and I had at least ten people waiting on the edge of their seats for me to finish the next chapter. It made me proud of myself and eager to create more. In fact, all of my art has always made me feel that way... until recently. I want that back.
Art in any form is a huge self-esteem boost for me, as well as a release of all of this creative energy I have inside of me. That's what I desperately need, and I'm not sure what's holding me back from getting it. I need to feel good about myself and what I do, and I need to share my ideas with the world, as terrifying as that might be sometimes. I wish I could just take a sledgehammer to all of these walls I've built up around myself. No idea how to do that. Anyone know a good shrink? Sometimes I feel like I'm just crazy.
Anyway, maybe I'll make some future posts about my book... if it's something anyone is interested in. I don't know. It might make me feel better to at least talk about it since I'm obviously not writing it. Bleh. Ok, I'm done ranting.
Quick update on things... Berry's festival was cancelled because of rain and has been moved to April 9th. I'll probably still be there... trying to work things out so I can make it. Hampton's Yellow Pollen Festival was a moderate success. Nothing great, but I sold about seven pieces of jewelry, so I guess that's good. Trying desperately to get up the motivation to finish the commissioned portraits I have lined up since people have been waiting a long time for them. Some people have promised to have jewelry parties for me soon, so hopefully that will happen and I can get some money there. I don't know. I think that's it. Off I go to do more of nothing.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)